Day 480 - PET & Seeds

Well, today was the day. The final PET scan. The end all & be all (I pray) of this chapter in my life. I don't know the results yet, but I am holding true to the belief that my scan will be cold. There won't be a cancer cell in sight.

Mom2 & I made 'almost tuna' this morning & she said it was great. I couldn't taste it because I was fasting for the scan. We quickly got ready & left for the hospital. Part way there, I interrupted her story to make sure she knew we were going to Foothills, right? Nope. She was headed for Peter Lougheed! Whoops! We altered our course, when I noticed the gas gauge. I interrupted the story again! $10 later we were back in business.

I raised a little ruckus at the Nuclear Medicine room. I am a little upset. This is my 3rd (& final) PET scan. I only found out yesterday that if you have a PET scan, you should avoid close contact with children for 6-7 hours - preferably 12, but 24 is even better. You shouldn't travel in the vehicle with them & if you do sit diagonally (?? Because radiation travels straight ahead?!?). I was quite frustrated that no one had told me this before & I was frantically trying to remember if I had visited anyone & substantially shortened their child's life span! Why doesn't it say this on the information letter every patient receives that gives directions to fast & only drink water? I saw a young Mom with a little baby in the waiting room, so I told her & her parents. They were from Medicine Hat & headed back today! The poor Mom was upset - as if she doesn't have enough to worry about! The Tech came & spoke with the parents after the Mom had gone in to prep for her scan & he told them to go to the Mall for a few hours & take the baby with so the radiation would have some more time to dissipate. I have since called the 'Powers That Be' to ensure that this doesn't continue to happen. It's such an easy thing to solve - just write on the paper that is sent to EVERY PATIENT - AVOID CONTACT WITH CHILDREN FOR 12-24 HOURS POST SCAN. And it's that easy.

I also gave one of the Tech Assistant's a talking to. She called Mom2's at 0700 this morning. She woke the entire house up just to see if I was pregnant or not. Wake me up at that hour & I could very well be the next OctoMom! 0900 is a far more respectable hour to inquire about someone's fertility status, no?

The scan went... well, it went. The scanner malfunctioned, so I had 3 scans instead of 2. Let's just hope they don't lose these results! (I still haven't heard the results of half of my last CT scan!) Additionally, I'm very grateful I have an Oncologist who doesn't believe in scanning me every 3 months. Yesterday & today I met people whose sisters & daughters are scanned every 3 months! That's insane! Don't they know that these scans CAUSE cancer?!? It's WAY too much radiation & FAR too unnecessary! Do your homework people! Yes, the scans can save your life by finding the cancer, however, listen to your body! You'll know when you need a scan! You can have a scan every 3 months & 4 weeks after the last scan, BOOM! You get cancer. Did the scan pick it up? No. Now you've had all that radiation for what? Sorry, rant ending now.

Mom picked me up & I clenched my teeth at her herky-jerky driving all the way across town. Apparently 3 weeks away wasn't quite long enough. She left me at Mom2's, or rather, I left her talking to Dad2 while I went downstairs to find a box. When I finally found it, she was gone. I came back up to find Mom2 coming in the door. I was officially starting to panic. I was trying to calculate how much seed I would need for the next 6 months. Oh, this is going to be fun.

Mom2 & I headed out to get ready for the trip. We picked up a Magic Bullet set, seeds for sprouts, sprout bags, seaweed, sparooli, mandoline slicer, kelp noodles... I'm very excited to get (un)cooking, but yikes! It's expensive! I've never been a kitchen girl before & I guess I never appreciated the cost that goes into eating! I'm learning fast!

I loaded up the car with my suitcases & headed home. I've got a busy few days ahead of me & not a lot of time to get everything done. I've started transferring old photos to a larger hard drive tonight, with the lofty goal of editing photos whilst on the ship with Jaco. That website is in the near future! I can taste it!

Oh! The 4 tray mini-dehydrator arrived today! It's perfect! It is small enough to fit into the luggage & I am very excited to have one to take along traveling. I know it will be put to good use! I've already filled Mom2's with nuts that we've soaked. I can't wait to make walnut taco meat & scarf down some dehydrated pecans! Yum!

Okay, off to bed... I need to sleep off the rest of my 'glowing' personality & get set for my dental appointment tomorrow.

xxxxMaria & Valentina (Mom stole Oceana for the night. Glad she likes to 'play house' every now & then)

Tweet Pea & Finny come along for the ride

Here's my last sentiments on PET scans & cancer!

About to be injected!

Here we go!

Radioactive!

An hour to kill!

In we go!

All done with the donut!

Day 252 - The Day After

Well, I will definitely contest to the fatigue factor! I finally fell asleep around 0100. I set the alarm for 0400 to get up & take my anti-emetic. It would have helped if I had turned the alarm on after I set it! Thankfully my internal clock was paranoid & I woke up at 0420!

I set the alarm for 1000 & double checked that it was indeed turned on! I woke up 2 minutes before the alarm went off. I lazed around for an hour or so & then climbed in the shower. I was feeling a bit feverish, but according to the thermometer I was not – thank goodness.

When they shatter your immune system with chemo, your body doesn’t pick up germs & colds like the regular person. No sneezes, no sniffles, no aches, just a raging fever & when that hits, you’re in BIG trouble! The tell you to go straight to the nearest emergency room!

I took a Tylenol & it seemed to help. I had already drank 1L of water by noon. My cousin Joleen, her husband Doug & their three children, Addison, Rhett & Nate showed up for lunch & a quick visit. They are from Saskatchewan & had traveled to Fairmont for a holiday.

I absolutely love their kids. They are some of the sweetest, most polite & well behaved children I have ever met.  They are 5, 3 & 1. Nate, the youngest, was SO EXCITED to see the dogs. They were trying to feed Nate (Doug & Joleen, not the dogs) some yogurt, when Nate had to sneeze, mid-excitement & mid-bite. It was a Yoplait shower all around!

Mom had made a beautiful salad for lunch & garnished it with some edible flowers. Addison & Rhett thought that was pretty neat, although they were a little reluctant to eat them!

After lunch we all went for a walk in the woods. Addison stepped smack dab in the middle of a cowpie. It was crusty on the outside, fresh in the middle – how I like my cookies, come to think of it! She asked me what it was & when I told her, she quickly notified her Mom of the nice green stuff on her pretty pink shoes! The next drama came when we stopped to take a photo of our group & somebody bumped into an anthill. Poor Addison ended up with ants all over her feet! Luckily they weren’t the biting kind! Poor girl!

We finished the rest of the walk unscathed & they hit the highway for the city to visit some more friends & family. Mom & I came inside & we both laid down for a nap. I slept until 1900 when she woke me up to see if I wanted to go to prayers. Of course I said yes. At least my mind did. My body was a little hesitant. My limbs felt slightly detached & ‘floaty’ but away we went.

It was great to be back in the Prayer Group. I miss the ‘embraced’ feeling of being surrounded by so many wonderful prayers & the knowing that I’m asking for direct guidance or help for myself & others. We always have a few good laughs too… Kevin told me tonight that YouTube bought out Twitter & Facebook. It’s now going to be called YouTwitFace. Ha ha ha. I was howling on that one! :o)

Mom & I left around 10 & I was feeling kind of warm. We stopped at Shopper’s Drug Mart to buy a better thermometer & a large bottle of Tylenol. Sure enough, I took the measurement & it was 38.4 with a little red unhappy face. I was pretty worried, so I called the hospital straight away & Dr. Owen called me back promptly. She told me not to worry about it just yet, as my WBC wouldn’t be low enough to cause any alarm. She said it was probably something viral & to take some Tylenol for it. If it didn’t change in the next day or so, give a call again. Phew! No dramas please!

We motored the rest of the way home, spotted a dog running in the clouds & went straight to bed. When was the last time you found shapes in the clouds? It had been a long time for me, but that little doggie jumped right out at me! Ears back & tail straight out the back too! Nice way to end the night.

Tomorrow will be preparing for the par-tay. I’m excited to see everyone & looking forward to a fun evening of close friends! Lotsa love & hugs…

Maria & Valentina

xoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Chatting with Jaco while the pooches snooze.

Doug, Addison & Valentina read a book.

On a nature walk.

Checking out the ant hill.

Family Photo of the Steel's!

Day 232 - Supernanny Rides Again... & Then Sleeps!

Oh happy day! I slept in until 0745! I was loving every minute of my sweet, sweet slumber past 0630! Harrison was awake before Heidi, but not by much - Heidi woke up around 0800. 


We had a great morning together. Heidi had a bottle, diaper change & went to sleep around 1000. Harrison & I coloured, read books & I sang him a few songs. I don't think I could come up with anymore farm animal noises for Old McDonald's Farm if I had to! Harrison is by far, the first & only human being to enjoy my singing. I wonder if he's had his hearing checked... either before or after! I bought him a Toy Story book & we read it about 6 times. It was a one sentence per page kinda book, so I became quite adept at elaborating!


I filled his water table with warm water & he played with his cars & tractors for awhile, but he was quite concerned about 'Tina' & if she was going to come out & play with him. We had some snacks & Gold Star for Harrison - we made it to the potty every time! Yay! 


Pretty soon it was time for lunch & then a nap. I've never seen a toddler so well behaved. When I said it was time for a nap, he literally RAN downstairs & crawled into his bed (with my help, of course). He picked out 2 books, we read them both, he asked to go potty, we did & then he laid down, turned his head onto his pillow & said, 'Bye!'. Wow! I was impressed! No crying, no fuss, no muss! I knew that Jenn & Mike kept both the kids on a regular routine & it pays off! They are by far the most well behaved kids I've met! Harrison & Heidi are pretty good too! :oP Sorry, couldn't resist that one! I know where to go for parenting advice when the day comes!


Heidi had woken up about an hour before Harrison laid down for his nap. By 1245, she was getting antsy. I knew Jenn wanted to leave right after she was finished work, so I had packed up all of my things & cleaned up the toys & dishes. All I had left to do was my shot. Today was my first day of fertility injections & they had to be done at 1300. I didn't want to hold Jenn up, so here I was in the kitchen, pants around my ankles & a crying baby who wouldn't quit unless I held her. Like I need any more pressure when I'm about to stab myself in the leg! Bless Heidi's little heart - she hung in there while I did my thing. A few hot flashes later, I was cleaned up & keeping Mama's youngest happy & quiet! 


Mom came home shortly thereafter & we loaded everyone up in their respective vehicles & we were off! I survived my first 3 days, well, 2 days as Supernanny! Hooray! 


Okay, I'm exhausted. Can I go home now? Valentina & I made our way home & I unpacked & prepared my laundry. 7 loads! Yes, it had been awhile! I started washing & drying & folding & sorting & nope, it's not going to be finished tonight! I'm pooped! Again, how do these Mothers do it? I'm in awe...


Sweet dreams of sleeping babies & smiles & laughter...
Maria & Valentina
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Harrison played & played & played some more.

He was such a good little boy - at lunch time, I said, 'Okay, your lunch is ready. Can you sit at your table please?' He literally RAN to his table & sat down & waited patiently for me to give him his lunch! What a Superstar!!!

Their nifty little video monitor to tell what baby is doing. Note the clippers in the background. Harrison came upstairs with them & was putting them through his hair & my hair. I didn't think they worked, but Jenn later reassured me they did indeed! Thank goodness Harrison didn't find the right button - my head shaving party would have been much earlier!!! :o)

Day 173 - Dr. Donato

Well today was the meeting. I had been anticipating this appointment for a very long time. Unfortunately I was at the end of the list to receive treatments at Castillo's, so I was late getting away to my appointment at Donato's. Not to worry though, as I only had to wait once I got there! 


His receptionist was lovely & much prettier than I had imagined. She was very helpful. The hospital was very clean & modern, much more pizzaz than any hospital I've been to in Canada. I learned later on that Hospital Angeles is where the rich in Mexico go. It's not a hospital for the general public. Hmm... That explains a lot! 


I visited with Dr. Duenas, the doctor who does the Homotoxicology treatments. He was also very knowledgeable & informative. Finally, Dr. Donato was ready for me. He reviewed all of my records & previous tests & scans, measured my neck, checked my pulse & breathing. We then sat down to discuss treatments. He talked a lot about diet & what a typical proper diet would consist of while I would be on treatment. 


He said I would see results within 24 hours of starting treatment. If I didn't, he would know that I would not be responsive to his treatment. That was encouraging! However, when the dust settled, as wonderful of a Doctor that he is & the promise of a gentler chemo, I just couldn't see a way that it would be financially possible. He was talking of 2 treatments per week for the first 3 weeks, and then 1 treatment per week for the following 4 weeks. At $1200-$1500 per treatment, that is nearly $15000 for the first 6 or 7 weeks! Adding to that, I would have to stay in San Diego for 6 weeks! The lodging alone would be atrocious! 


I left his office in tears, promising to be in touch with him, but knowing full well that I would never return to his office. Some things are just out of reach. I waited for the shuttle to pick Valentina & I up & it was back to the hotel. 


Naturally, I didn't feel like visiting with anyone. No emails, no skype, nothing. Jaco phoned & I talked to him briefly. I was angered when he said my progress with Castillo proved to him once & for all that Alternative Medicine doesn't work. I wasn't in the mood for any arguments & provoking comments. 


I went to Target to return the stinky puppy training spray, as well as the blender. Valentina rode the 'double decker bus' to Target, as I put the blender box underneath her carrier bag on the trolley. I stopped at Office Depot to pick up some tape, markers & stickers to prepare for the big cargo flight. I also stopped in to the beauty supply store to pick up some wax & a blow dryer. I finally found a portable travel dryer! Yay! As for the wax, I could have saved my money... As it would turn out, I was far too busy to wax my legs! Besides the eczema would have removed yet another layer of skin!


On to Target... I ended up leaving with an iPod Touch. It was an 'I Feel Sorry For Myself Today' present. It was on sale & iPods never go on sale. My best friend had been sharing with me all the wonderful tools she has on hers, so I thought I could find equal use for mine. If nothing else, a countdown tool to tick away the rounds of chemo.


As I waited for the trolley to return to the hotel, shortly after dark, I watched the shady characters flit about the trolley station. If anyone approached me, my plan was to show them my enormous neck & tell them I had flesh eating disease & any money or things they would take from me would inflict the same grotesque conditions upon them. :o) And then I sat there & sobbed as the reality of chemo slowly began to wash over me.


I don't think I have ever felt more frustration & more defeat. It's worse than losing the Grade 3 spelling bee on television, worse than losing the gold medal in the Grade 10 volleyball tournament, worse than having your heart broke by someone you completely loved who had just confessed they don't love you. At all. Nothing compares to the defeat. I have tried & tried. Yes, I could have done more. I can always do more. But why? Why didn't it work for me when it has worked for so many others? I wanted to badly to be a shining example of another method that WOULD WORK! 


I cried for the potential damage to my lungs. Never having dove the Great Barrier Reef or the Dead Sea. I cried for the potential damage to my heart. Would I ever run a marathon or climb a mountain again? I cried for the potential damage to my reproductive organs. Would I ever experience life as a mother or am I destined to be the crazy dog lady forever? Yeah, sure it gets rid of the lumps in my body, but what about the rest of my life?  Sure, the side effects aren't bad for everyone, but where is my guarantee? 


Pretty much ticked off at the world, I collapsed into bed. Physically, mentally & emotionally drained. Here's to a less heavy day tomorrow. 


xxxxxxx
Maria y Valentina

Carrie & Olga leaving for home!

Security Guard for some politician. The Guard was wearing a bullet proof vest, but he was more interested in the soap opera on tv than the politician upstairs! :o)